Trickstasy-4

It was almost six months after Africa had come to trickstasy.That was the last time she actually did. Bablu Carmaker had by now, started using the car of his heart to make frequent tours of Africa.

Trickstasy had seen an over-haul. Khacchar Bhattacharjee, Peshab Sore-car and Shoe-deep-ta were talking over meal. They were shocked at the food in the mess. Pleasant Wind was angry. How can juniors question the quality of food, he said. They should be prepared to eat shit if their seniors feed them. All that their parents earn after days of hard work are inconsequential.

The newest casualty of food in the mess was Ebony Nelson-Mandela Tatenda-Taibu Bharali (ENT Bharali). He and Wind Buzzer-Bore-Hua were admitted to  SMC. Pillowcase said ,”These new recruits will soon stop getting ill. We had worse food under the Prefect himself two years ago. See our immune has successfully responded, and unless we are Khatam, who is just one step short of being a cannibal, we never have stomach related ailments.”Khatam said that people like Mad-house Dev Choudhury and Xoru-moru Asuraditya Bhattacharya also fell ill because they came from aristocratic Manuwadi Brahmin families, who were good for nothing. Pillowcase asked him to think over as to whose family he was actually questioning. Khatam blushed.

Nonojeet Wallnut had stopped coming to Trickstasy. He was afraid that Pillowcase would take the hell out of him if he caught him in some really disastrous room. ENT Bharali was the trump card in the Trickstasy Drunkards cricket team in the night tournament. He could negate the effect of lights wherever he stood. He stood as a wicket keeper. The batsmen complained of bad light. The Umpires took out the lightometer, and in the mean time Xoru-Moru Asuraditya was sneaked into the field. The Umpires decided the light was excellent. Xoru-Moru was taken out. No batsman could see the ball, and Trickstasy won. ENT Bharali was declared Man of the Series.

Trickstasy Jumbo-pack

Trickstasy…part one..introduction

There was a pandemonium in the prefect Aashik Das’ room. Gangotri’s team had just won the hand eye co-ordination match against Phattu’s team and it was as if they had conquered the world. Gangotri was of the opinion that although having Gumnam No-no-jeet Wallnut and Radha-the-Morphine was an advantage, that would be canceled by the disadvantage of having Peon So-know-all.And Tusker was also in great form from Phattu’s team.Hagsa, a self styled commentator was there, pointing out that if he would have replaced Phattu or Ghanti Patha from their teams, there was none stopping him.Asura Danabendra intervened and called them a bunch of useless morons.

“Hagsa does not get much time to play CS”, said Pillow-case.”He and Go-Wrong are always busy managing the mess that is going on in Trickstasy or else he would have been as great a CS player as Gangotri himself!”, observed Pillow,passing a silent smile at Khatam. Khatam seemed disinterested as he had just come from the hospital where A-meat Patha was admitted, due to heart-ache.

“Anyways, how is A-meat and who is with him now?”, asked the third Patha, Goru Ganju Patha.

“Yesterday the lazy Bablu Carmaker was with him, but today he himself got admitted. So I have sent the pocket dynamo, Door-Knob Jaan to be with them. Cheer-on-Me and Anoop Rhododendron will visitthem in an hour.”, said Khatam , as he silently left the room. Fifty-car and Shabbier Alley were busy cursing each other for not having found the girl of their choice, Shabbier wanting to erase the memories of a disastrous performance by his team led by The-Big-Butt-Dog-A. “You can’t even shoot down an ant, let alone the baby Laltu”, observed The-Big-Butt-Dog-A.

“No need to shoot them .Be it ants or be it elephants, I will eat them up”, said Don Moy (translated to I am Don) Naikia, as he eased himself up in Aashik’s bed. Porky Balia entered the room cursing Phattu’s team’s coordination. Hagsa explained to him how to improve the coordination by giving voice commands like he did.Porky ran away as he could not bear that, and collided on the way with The Nash (translated to the end) Chawal. Undy Khool Ja then called an ambulance to take them to the hospital.Eye-sees , the Nagu too accompanied them.Son-Jeep-Pole was very concerned at their situation. “Both are so bulky, and anyone who collides with The Nash hardly does survive.” All the pandemonium stopped when the news came that Porky was seriously hurt and had receded to a coma.(to be continued)

Trickstasy—part2

Porky was in the ICU and people were really worried as to whether a collision could be so fatal. But they took their first sigh of relief when, four days later, the doctor came and told them that he was out of danger. Katalagena Kangkar Nath, the President of GMIT offered to pay for the expenses from the GMIT Fund of Night Parties. Three Night Parties were left suspended for the speedy recovery of Porky.But, the President promised that when Porky would recover, there would be one Great Party.Hero Indra Bhatt would be the Chief Guest.After all Porky was one of the founding members.

Meanwhile, Porky was shifted to the General Ward of the hospital.

The scene and the smell around the hospital was disgusting. Pillowcase wondered, “I guess people here are kept here so that they think twice before getting ill in Silchar. The overpowering smell of sh** will nauseate you.And you never feel like coming to this hell of a place.”

A-meat Patha lay in the bed beside, his heart ache showed little signs of relief. Khatam was sure that the heart-ache was passed on by A-meat to Bablu. “Poor Bablu, how he loved Nature. How he longed to be in the dense forests of Africa. And see what A-meat has passed on to him. Look at Rhododendron, and how he loved the Vanilla plant, yet he was never admitted to the hospital. These guys are a bit Gorky.

Fifty Car joined in the conversation . “Be positive guys. Look at the great transformation when A-sick Das was renamed Ashik Das due to his heroics. Nothing is impossible, and Bablu, you are the Carmaker. You should build a better car than TATA Safari, that will take you to your Africa.”..(to be continued)

Trickstasy—part3

Bablu Carmaker began making preparations for going to Africa. He was not alone in the task, his roomies Snail-e-Hasish Banky, Door Knob Jaan and pseudo roomie Radha the Morphine ran errands for him. Once , when the car was being prepared, Khatam visited him . Khatam was not satisfied with the process, as it did not have proper facilities for defecating. He was of the opinion that the Car should have air conditioner with Flatulence Removal enabled so that he and Nonojeet Wallnut could travel safely in it. Pillowcase went a step further. He wanted to have the removed gas recycled for alternative fuel.

The road to Africa was full of obstacles .Obstacles like Tsunami. Aam-rickshaw, suggested So-deep-ta was an alternate route.Pillowcase and fifty-car declared loud that, sending Bablu to Africa would be risky. It would be better to bring Africa to Bablu.

Bablu himself was confused. He had spent money and time on the car to Africa. But he believed that the Trickstasy Ideology was not something to be done away with, as the drunken gods of Trickstasy would be furious at the Gustaakhi.Specially he could not invite the fury of God Romanov Smirnoff. So,he agreed to the advice and decided to bring Africa to Trickstasy.That was ominous stuff…(to be continued)

Trickstasy—part3

Bablu Carmaker began making preparations for going to Africa. He was not alone in the task, his roomies Snail-e-Hasish Banky, Door Knob Jaan and pseudo roomie Radha the Morphine ran errands for him. Once , when the car was being prepared, Khatam visited him . Khatam was not satisfied with the process, as it did not have proper facilities for defecating. He was of the opinion that the Car should have air conditioner with Flatulence Removal enabled so that he and Nonojeet Wallnut could travel safely in it. Pillowcase went a step further. He wanted to have the removed gas recycled for alternative fuel.

The road to Africa was full of obstacles .Obstacles like Tsunami. Aam-rickshaw, suggested So-deep-ta was an alternate route.Pillowcase and fifty-car declared loud that, sending Bablu to Africa would be risky. It would be better to bring Africa to Bablu.

Bablu himself was confused. He had spent money and time on the car to Africa. But he believed that the Trickstasy Ideology was not something to be done away with, as the drunken gods of Trickstasy would be furious at the Gustaakhi.Specially he could not invite the fury of God Romanov Smirnoff. So,he agreed to the advice and decided to bring Africa to Trickstasy.That was ominous stuff…(to be continued)

A story

Talent or lack of it, and hard work or lack of it had driven him to the Institute. One might argue could have achieved better by working harder. But, he had not at least idled out his time. Like all of his generation, who grew up in post liberal India, and crept to youth in the 21st century, he too had the desire of fulfilling his parent’s intentions. And though they never forced him, he could understand very well what they wanted.

As a boy he grew up wanting nothing, asking for only childlike desires, and almost always following his heart. He was a stranger to the new avenues, but he wanted the newer avenues to shape or reshape his destiny. He had gone with the crowd and taken up computers, but he hardly knew why he had done that, and what he was ultimately going to do with that.

One day at a Graphics class, and the struggle through programming lessons made him aware that this was not a world for him. He had to cope up with adverse circumstances. The misty past was no longer there, and future beckoned. But he was nowhere.

Slowly, he found people to talk to. Suddenly, a few hits on the face and a few minutes of chair-session made him feel like hell. All the interest seemed to be lost, and he found that human beings could behave much differently from his family and friends. The world seemed to collapse and then get up again. He thought it was time to adapt.

The old man who lectured on social values seemed so nice till, l of course when he appeared the exams, when the same man expected him to write a story for a question that was expected to be answered in two minutes!! “Guess who is polluting the papers now??” he thought to himself. And that too for a subject which was so different from computers!!!Still he agreed and moved on, giving his best for the inconsequential subject as well!! Every now and then, he thought about what a fool they were making out of him.

Then was the turn to meet the Binary-Man, who paid attention to the perfectness of an answer. Perfect or Zero philosophy was hard to digest. No one was a superman, but here in this Institute you had to be. Imperfect people were like second-class citizens. Just get them admitted, and never care whether they pass or fail, or even live or die. And at this point of time the old Social-Man seemed to blissfully disappear. It was mythology. The gods could do no wrong!!!

If the Binary-Man was not enough, there was a Great-Man who thought that students securing less than half the mark should fail, though the convention was of one-third the marks. He guessed that the education system would improve if the same subject was repeated over and over again. There was a friend of his, Back-Man who believed that at least a tenth of people should repeat the subject for the sake of excellence.

All these philosophies could not enter his mind, but he had to adjust. After all it was not his Institute, but of the all-powerful gods, who had assumed the avatars of men. He should have considered it his privilege to learn from the gods. He had no say, indeed he was not supposed to have any voice. That bounded area seemed out of the purview of Indian Democracy, it seemed like a filthy dance of power.

Now that the time had come to move on, he knew that the four years of living amidst non-humans and humans together shaped his career. After all he found humans who gave him a shoulder to cry on, a dream to express, a word of praise for the worst of his works, and inspired him to a new level of existence, people who brought him out of dismal moments, and urged him to move on. He might have emerged morally deteriorated to a class of people, but he knew he had shaped himself into a better man. This shy boy found pleasure in talking to people, and looking at the world though a lot many eyes.

But at what cost? At the cost of losing his individuality? Perhaps not. Only time will answer!!

A year ago!!

(Related to the night when I was "caught" )

A year ago.. I had a dream

I did not look out of the window…Because it was midnight now..Hardly did I expect the mosquitoes in the middle of the night, …To disturb the sweetness of sleep

One came near my ear…Started buzzing “KILL ME, KILL ME”…I just took my hand out to swat it

But then he assumed dangerous proportions…I could not find out what was night and what was day

I realised..Aj kal to hamari raatein hi nahi humaare dean bhi kharab hai..

The next one came buzzing by my ear…It seemed..He did not like the smell of my blood..He seemed to fly away..but then he came..But he did not hesitate to suck the liquid red..right out my veins..Bad Mosquito…cannot stand up to your false ideals..i thought

A poor mosquito buzzed louder Threatened to throw out the human populace out of the residential quarters..I listened quitely..It was like the mosquito was winning the race against humanity…Tried all chemicals against him..But soon realised..he was at ease..”chemically”

There was also a mad mosquito…The mosquito which the humans feared…His sting was legendary…When the others were sucking gallons of blood…He just seemed to frown..”Where is my share”, he growled

There was also a poor mosquito…He knew not why he had come…But looking at his fellow mosquitoes..He learnt a trick or two…Even he seemed deadlier today

Dream Over

It is not only in my dream that mosquitoes created havoc..Even in the commonwealth games dengue related pullbacks showed it was “ADVANTAGE MOSQUITOES”

Gulzar-through my eyes

“Gulzar, is a poet above all things.” Though widely recognised as a lyricist who has made his contributions to the Indian musical arena and enriched it like very few people have done, Gulzar is not a person whose identity,like all others is restricted to Indian Cinema or now, World Cinema alone. He is somewhat above that.His “psychologically adept examination of human sensibilities” has taken human thought to a new pedestal altogether.

Gulzar for me is the Gulzar I know,the Gulzar who has made a deep impact on my thoughts as well. Well, I relate to him through the number of verses which he has written, and those which have touched my heart. I appreciate Gulzar with a sense of astonishment. Yes, astonishment at the intricracies of human behaviour that he so beautifully depicts and at the simplicity of certain thoughts that remain so concealed in human life.

 Let us live some of his verses and relive them..

 “Nazar me rehte ho, jab tum nazar nahi aate…yeh sur milaate hain jab tum idhar nahi aate“..as he refers to the people across the border, who have been separated from us by petty politics.

Zindagi kya hai jaan-ne ke liye, zinda rehna bahut zaroori hai, aaj tak koi bhi raha to nahi ” teaches you humility. To know what life is, one should remain alive. But no one has done that till date.

 “Ae hairathe aashiqui jagaa mat, pairon se zameen, zameen laga mat” urging the dream not to end.


There are a thousand such ……but let us end with one…

“Music has a natural place in our lives. Right from the shloka you recite in your morning puja and the milkman who comes whistling on his cycle, to the fakir singing as he begs for alms and your mother humming around the kitchen. Music fills our spaces naturally. It will always be dear to us.”…

Labrador

All characters appearing in this work are fictitious. Any resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

Khatam, the adamant squirrel was unhappy. He did not like a mega event like Labrador to be shifted to the gallery from the open stage. Gumnami, the turtle and Tsunami,the monkey, practical and less venturous as usual, decided against it as the rain gods might  be furious.Ullucase,the owl and the laziest of the lot, had no problems with either venues at first, but later he realised that since Labrador had the tagline “come and bark out here,as we know, barking dogs seldom bite”,it would really be good if the participants were allowed to bark their hearts out.A-meat, the meaty rabbit, who always believed himself to be an endangered species was really in support of the namis .He found their suggestions more practical. Sam-the-rat was their senior.And they valued his advice, but he was hardly in his senses for the length of the day.

What followed was a pandemonium of squeaks,screeches, shrieks, and hoots, and drums from the balcony of Khatam’s room. The squirrel was adamant as usual, but what was surprising was the coordination that the owl and the rabbit put forward in the arguments. Ullucase,the owl was happy that the debate ended earlier as Gumnami and Tsunami were safely sleeping in their hostels.Cheer-on-me, the Giraffe , who was the room-mate of Khatam was deriving fun out of the heated debate. Their second roommate Anup Rhododendron had already gone to sleep.

These animals, however, were no ordinary animals. They had passed the AIEEE(All India Endangered Entrance Examinations) held by humans and had entered the institute to learn how to be as sensible as the human beings.

You might be wondering if there was a single human being amid these flora and fauna. Yes there were a lot of them, and were, as usual,  the most intelligent of them all. They were given responsibilities of making these animals civilized.

They had approached Dr. Rayon Chatterjee , the first human they found themselves comfortable with since their entry into the institute.They came to him with crude ideas and he taught them patiently, how to conduct refinements into their plans.They were on their way to conduct a mega event like Labrador.

But Tsunami and Gumnami brought culture into the picture, asking for gamusas and japis.Labrador therefore came out to be not just a dog’s show you see in New Dog TeleVision(NDTV) or Times Bhow.It was Labrador.